


A Different Kind of Intimacy

by EnsorcelledReader



Category: Homestuck
Genre: Asexual John, Fluff, M/M, both boys insecure about their relationship, both nsfw and sfw, but with an asexual character, handjobs, tags will be added as needed, yes its an otp challenge thing
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-03-27
Updated: 2016-06-12
Packaged: 2018-05-29 08:38:10
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 4
Words: 6,334
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6367174
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/EnsorcelledReader/pseuds/EnsorcelledReader
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>This is basically a series of interconnected vignettes using the challenge lists...because I like them. It will not be done in 30 days or 60 days, it will probably be longer than that. John is of age in this fic, although there is roughly a 10 year age difference between the two.</p><p>This is a sequel to my "A Surprisingly Compatible Relationship" fic, but you don't have to read that to understand what's going on in this fic. Also, each chapter is mostly self-contained (meaning if you don't like a chapter you can skip it without losing any understanding of what's going on). So if you don't want to read the NSFW chapters you can totally skip them without hurting you ability to understand the story.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Shopping

**Author's Note:**

> Okay, yes I will be doing just as many NSFW chapters as SFW chapters, but the NSFW things aren't going to just be sex scenes. This will be more or less an exploration of intimacy between Ace John and a very sexual Dirk. The NSFW section will contain a lot of "I can't do this." or "Let's not" moments that serve as finding boundaries and compromises for the two. While they will have sex it will be infrequent and Dirk is going to learn how to reciprocate John performing a sexual act (like a hand job) in non-sexual ways. At the same time, John is going to learn how he fits into Dirk's sexuality. So they will participate in sex acts together, John may even enjoy some of them, but ultimately the series is a look at unconventional intimacy. If that makes sense.
> 
> Also, for those looking for a sex repulsed, sex averse, touch averse, asexual, this isn't the fic for you. I view John as someone that definitely falls on the asexual spectrum, but I see him as a very sensual person (loves being kissed and when bro rubs his legs or squeezes his butt, just never wants it to go further than that), and also as someone who wants to experience sex as a way to get closer to Dirk, his reasons are purely emotional, not sexual.

John was waiting in the pick-up area. He had already seen his father off, business trip to New York, he’ll be gone for about two weeks. Of course, despite the fact that John was twenty now, this didn’t stop his father from worrying about leaving him alone for two weeks. It’s summer and he’d already been living in Texas for most of the past two years, attending university, you’d think Dad would stop worrying already. _A father will always worry about his child, that is what fathers do._ John laughed to himself, his dad worried too much, but he appreciated the care and concern, kind of made him feel guilty about telling his father he was inviting a "friend” over while he was away.

The tall blonde with anime shades strode into the pick-up area, pretty easy to spot the tan built figure in a sea of business suits and pasty faces. John waved him over with a smile. “How was your flight?”

“Good, good. What’s with the outfit?” John was sporting his blue hoodie and plaid pajama pants, complete with Yoda slippers.

John looked down, “What’s wrong with it?”

“Do you always go out in your pajamas?”

“Sometimes, it’s really not that big of a deal. Besides, I had to get up early to take dad, I’d rather sleep as much as I can than dress nicely. If people don’t like my outfit they can look away.” John’s tone rather laid back as a yawn escaped him. “Mind if we get some coffee before we head home?”

“Sure, there was a Starbucks inside, if you want.”

“Nah, I don’t want to go back in, there’s another one down the block with a drive-thru.”

“Okay.” The two stepped outside only for Dirk to realize how cold the Washington summer felt. “I thought it was summer, why is it so cold.”

“It’s 65 degrees.”

“It’s raining.”

“It’s July, of course it’s raining. Look, see, those people are in shorts. This is what summer is.”

“That guy is wearing socks with his sandals.”

“Yeah, well, people aren’t really worried about looking cool here. You’ll find that most people are dorks like me.”

Dirk had never seen John so calm and silent. He was usually obnoxiously energetic. Must be too early for him. They exited the parking lot and at the nearest intersection, Dirk spotted the Starbucks, on either side of the street, both with full parking lots. He was surprised when John instead pulled into the parking lot of a Safeway.

“Sorry, I forgot we need milk and eggs, do you mind?”

“No, it’s fine, but I thought you wanted coffee.”

“I’ll just get one in the grocery store.”

“Wait, there’s another Starbucks in the grocery store, when there’s already two out here.”

“Yep, I’ll grab some coffee before we grab the stuff, come on.” John motioned for the older man to follow him, taking his hand as they met on the other side of the car.

Sure enough, there was a little Starbucks kiosk type of structure near the door of the grocery store. “Hello, I’d like a triple, skim, 160, venti mocha, please. What about you Dirk?”

“I’m good.”

John frowned, “He’ll have a double, half and half, 140, grande latte, please.” When Dirk gave him a questioning look John said, “You’ve had a long flight and said you were cold, this will warm you up. We’ve been together for over a year, I know how you drink your coffee.” John paid and they waited for their drinks. While they waited, John noticed a collection of small cups filled with beverages on display. “Ooo, what are these?”

“Samples of our new frappuccinos, the ones with the green straw are cookie swirl and the ones with the red straw are caramel crunch, feel free to take one.” Said the barista in a cheery tone. John snatched one with a green straw and gestured to them for Dirk to take one, but didn’t push it when Dirk declined. In seconds, the sample was gone and their drinks were ready. John handed Dirk’s drink to him and immediately reclaimed the free hand in his. Dirk blushed a little as John dragged him to the dairy section, the boy sure could be cute when he wanted to be, that little determined face with the Yoda slippers, just, too cute.

John let go of his hand to grab the gallon of milk. Dirk, reached and took the gallon from John’s hand, giving the boy a quick peck when his face turned. The goofy grin he was rewarded made his chest clench, why was this boy so precious? And how did he have the ability to turn Dirk into a swooning school girl with one cheesy grin? “Okay, grabbed the eggs, let’s go.”

Dirk snapped back to reality “’Kay.” The lines were surprisingly long this early in the morning, even in the express checkout. Of course an old woman had to take forty god damned items to a ten or less cashier.

“Hey, what’s today?”

“Friday the 15th.”

“Awesome, I’m going to grab something, stay in line.”

“Sure.”

John took off towards the bakery section, disappearing behind a display of donuts. The old women had finally paid for all of her things and there was only one person in front of them (with a reasonable amount of items), Dirk placed the milk and eggs on the conveyor belt.  John came rushing back with a chocolate cake, a big five dollar sticker on top of the container. “Can’t pass up five dollar Friday.” He said cheerily. Dirk smirked and ruffled the boy’s hair, “You eat too much sugar.”

“No I don’t, you don’t eat enough. That’s why you’re so impassive all the time.” They quickly paid their total and took the groceries to the car. Tossing their empty coffee cups in the recycling bin (John intercepted Dirk’s cup headed for the trash) before leaving, everything quickly loaded up and the two back in their seats. “Hey, Dirk?” John reached over, turning the blonde’s face towards his own, kissing the other sweetly, pulling away just enough to say, “I’m happy you’re here.”

Dirk held John’s head in place, kissing him a little more forcefully, flicking his tongue across the other’s lips. Dirk could hear a small giggle before John opened his mouth letting the wet appendage roam inside, sucking on it and getting the most amusing sound out of his boyfriend. Sucking on the tongue again earned strong hands pulling him over to the passenger seat, in his beloved’s lap, softly petting muscular arms that held him in place. Dirk pulled away, kissing the younger’s neck, just the way he likes, earning a cute surprised noise, a giggle, and a “We should get home! We can kiss more there, I promise.”

“I’m happy I’m here too.” Dirk happily sighed as he relinquished his claim on John’s neck. “I missed you.”

John kissed his forehead, “I missed you too.”


	2. Cuddling Somewhere

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Dirk is ooc in this chapter, I just wanted something super fluffy after the update. Forgive me.

The door opens with a click, keys deposited on the table next to it, as John says “It’s a little messy, I didn’t get a chance to clean.”

“You’ve been in my house, you know I don’t give a shit.”

John gave a goofy smile, taking the groceries, bought on the way home from the airport, into the kitchen. Dirk followed him and watched as John put away the eggs and milk and placed the cake on the counter, so routine, yet so personal. Little mannerisms caught his eye as John kicked the refrigerator closed with his foot and removed the plastic cover from the sugary treat, a little frosting caught on his thumb, which he made quick work of with his mouth. The older man felt an ache in his chest for the younger male. How he missed these little mundane activities the near month they’ve been apart, missed the way John twirls his utensils before using them, like he’s doing now with the cake knife. He’s pulled to John like a magnet, complete opposites in expression, but a strong unspoken bond or at least, that’s the way Dirk thinks of their relationship.

The irresistible pull of John forced Dirk to stand behind him, brushing shy fingertips down his arm and waist, before muscular, needy arms encircled him and a husky whisper asked “Can you put down the knife? Just for a sec.” John complied, half wondering where this was going, when Dirk picked him up, whisking him into the living room and onto the couch, sinking into its depths and his boyfriend’s warm grip.

“My cake…” John whined.

“You’ve had enough sugar for a little while, you know how much was in that mocha?”

John feigned resistance and fight before quickly relaxing into the warm embrace, snuggling against Dirk with a satisfied sigh. Dirk breathed in his scent from the still damp hair, John couldn’t be bothered to pull the hood of his hoodie over his head, despite the down pour, resulting in a scent that was part rain, part coffee, and part something uniquely John. “I missed you…so much.” Dirk whispered in his ear.

John tilted his head, lips barely brushing Dirk’s as he whispered back “I missed you too,” and kissed the blonde with every ounce of affection that existed within him. Their kiss was emotionally desperate, they couldn’t get close enough, they couldn’t connect enough, nothing was enough to make up for their time apart. Dirk’s hand wandered, his desperation slightly different from John’s, existing not only in emotional form, but sexual as well. He forced himself to separate from his goofy paramour, to prevent any unwanted circumstances, he didn’t want John to feel pressured.

Once separated the two, they laid there, staring into each other’s eyes. “Sing to me, please.” John asked softly. A request that made Dirk smirk arrogantly, he did have a fantastic singing voice if he did say so himself.

“Anything you want babe.”

“Anything?” A ghost of a prankster smile on his features, he was learning from Dirk how to hide his emotions when it suited him.

Dirk saw the expression, but chose not to address it. “Anything.”

“The Science Love Song.”

The smile fell from Dirk’s face, he’s going to kill Dave.

Roxy wanted to impress her boyfriend in 9th grade, but knew nothing of music, however wanted to use her knowledge of biology to write a song. Dirk helped her, diversifying her lyrics into a more general science content, this was fifteen fucking years ago, and OF COURSE Dirk had wanted to help his friend. He hadn’t expected his mother to record them practicing, or share it with Dave. Fuck.

“You said any song I wanted. That’s the song I want.” John smiled, he really did like the song. “There’s no one here. You don’t have to hide your true nature.”

“That song was to help Roxy when I was fucking fifteen, it was far dorkier then I would ever normally write. She loves that goofy shit. It’s not exactly something I’m proud of.”

“You said whatever I wanted.” John repeated.

Dirk huffed. “This is you one dork pass for my time here.”

“You’re the one who’ll be the dork, not me.”

“You know what I mean John. Don’t ask me to wear stupid clothes or anything else.”

“Fine.” There was no intention of keeping his word, Dirk acted tough, but he had his own nerd interests that John was determined to see him embrace. More than anything, he just wanted to hear Dirk’s voice, he had a lovely deep warm sounding voice that always gave John chills. A voice that he could drown in.

  
 _I’ll be the spark, if you’ll be the flame_  
Start a reaction that can’t be contained  
Balance your pH by sharing my base  
I’ll be your star, if you’ll be my space

John snuggled closer, the lyrics may be corny, but hearing them from Dirk’s dulcet and low tones made him feel special, he’s the only one that gets to hear this, this little secret indulgence. __  
  
‘Cause there is no distance that I wouldn’t go  
Through spacetime and wormholes my matter would flow  
To the edge of the universe  
  
I’ll be your G, if you will be C  
Or I can be A, if you will be T  
If there’s a mutation I’ll fix every base  
Working as your zinc finger nuclease  
  
Just like an atom, don’t rip us apart  
Unless you want a big BOOM in my heart

John snorted, doing his best to stifle his laughter.

“I will fucking stop.”

“Sorry, sorry. It’s cute.”

“It was Roxy’s line, not mine.”

“Okay, sorry. Please continue.” Giving Dirk a kiss on the cheek for encouragement. _  
_  
 _We can take it fast or really slow_  
But we can’t know with certainty where we’ll go  
If at first we don’t succeed, we’ll try two more times  
So our failure’s a statistically significant try  
  


John broke into another fit of giggles.

“THIS WAS ROXY’S SONG! C’mon John, I don’t want to sing this anymore.”

“No! I swear I’ll stop. Please, I want to hear you sing.” John shifted, kissing him repeatedly all over his face, drifting back to his neck and behind his ear. “Please, for me, please.”

“You laugh one more time and I’m done.”

“I know, I won’t, I’m sorry.”

  
 _Like an equation, it all works out_  
If we balance the sides there’s no need to doubt  
  
This is your science love song  
A place to start our chemical bond  
A research endeavor  
We can write the conclusion together  
  


John buried his face in Dirk’s neck, feeling the vibration as he hit all the proper notes. Listening to the sweet melodious nectar, John was able to block out some of the funnier lyrics.

  
 _Just like the movies I’d steal your heart  
But then you’d die…so I won’t do that  
  
If we broke up I’d be no more  
I’d give up H2O for H2SO4  
Take away gravity, I’d still fall for you  
Share my last electron in a covalent bond for two  
  
'Cause you’re like that angle, A-cute and you’re smart  
Your labcoat and goggles go straight to my heart  
Except that’s a lie, cause the heart doesn’t feel  
When it comes to love the brain seals the deal  
_  
 _This is your science love song_  
A place to start our chemical bond  
A research endeavor  
We can write the conclusion together  
  


John tensed as he listened to the last line, his favorite line he loved to hear Dirk sing when they were alone like this.

  
_'Cause you matter to me_

The way he sang that line never ceased to make John’s heart melt and shivers ring throughout his body.

“Okay, my turn.”

John yelped as he felt Dirk shift, bringing into an inescapable space between the couch and Dirk’s body. He felt wetness on his neck and relaxed into his fate, allowing his shirt to be taken off as Dirk moved once more to hover over him. Kisses trailed over his body, Dirk called it worship, John simply thought of it as affection. He wasn’t always a fan of it, but didn’t mind today. Dirk was mindful of the negotiated barriers and didn’t remove John’s boxers, instead turning the boy over and kissing up his spine as John lay there, enjoying the attention. When he was finished he pulled the smaller male into a crushing snuggle, sighing as he felt the bare skin under his fingertips.

“I’m never singing that song again.”

“We’ll see.”

“I’m serious John, never again.”

John smiled and chose to remain silent. “I mean it, I’m never singing that again.”

“Okay Dirk.”

“Really.”

“Yes, I know.”

Dirk held on for a while longer, repeating himself over and over again about how he won’t sing that song ever again. John was fine listening to it (it is Dirk’s voice after all), but eventually insisted that he should be allowed some cake for his trouble.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is an actual song that you can watch here: https://youtu.be/pocNl2YhZdM
> 
> I promise future chapters will keep him more in character!


	3. Gaming

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Was going to post this last week, but it's getting to be that point in the quarter where stuff is getting more intense. Stories like this one, Succession of the Line, and the final portion of Intimacy Through Time and Space are probably going to suffer for a little bit. There probably won't be as many updates until summer.

Dirk was trying really hard to respect John’s boundaries, he was doing his best to understand that he didn’t feel that attraction, being alone like this though, made it difficult. They hadn’t ever lived together, Dirk maybe stayed the odd night at John and Dave’s place, but that’s about it. This was different, sleeping in the same bed every night, seeing the water glisten off his body when he got out of the shower, smelling him, the boy always smelled like coffee and fucking chocolate. It was so tempting, in the best and worst ways. They had made-out of course, but Dirk wanted more, he just couldn’t bring himself to ask. He had been exceptionally conscious of John’s feelings, he didn’t want John to ever feel like he wasn’t good enough. He didn’t want John to do what Jake did…because of him.

The tension building within him was becoming unbearable now and John sitting in his lap, while his arms wrapped around the smaller one’s torso, chin resting on his shoulder. They were playing some racing game (he couldn’t even remember the fucking name at this point), John shifting this way and that with his fuck car. He prayed John couldn’t feel his hard-on on his butt. Once the race was finished John gave him a kiss, “Aw, I lost.” Dirk smirked at his triumph, thank god, he must not feel it. “One more?”

“Sure.”

Of course, John’s prankster gambit knows no bounds, even using it to give him an edge in a video game. He felt Dirk’s dick on his ass, of course he did, Dirk was huge and John was wearing thin shorts, he could feel everything. And he used it to his advantage. When Dirk was able to overtake him the race, John choose that moment to grind against him, chuckling to himself when he heard a moan behind him. Dirk seemed to regain a little of his composure, although John noticed his hands were shaking. The blonde still managed to take the secret short cut and throw out an item to slow John down…well the younger male just wasn’t having that. He continued to grind against Dirk until he was once more in first place, although it seemed that Dirk wasn’t really paying attention to the game anymore.

No, Dirk had officially lost control, truth was he hadn’t touched himself since John left Texas…little secret, Dirk had some…predilections towards kink…a lot of kinks actually. He was nervous about asking John to engage in them with him, fearful that it would make the brunette leave. That didn’t stop him from pretending though. Dirk rather liked being dominated, whenever John gave him a hand job he asked John to put his hand on Dirk’s chest while the other jacked him off. What he hadn’t explained was the reason behind it, John never asked. When the brunette left, Dirk pretended that John forbade him from touching himself or pleasuring himself in anyway. In retrospect, this was a mistake. He couldn’t help himself, he dropped the controller, burying his face in John’s neck as he inhaled deeply before latching on and sucking a big red bruise. His hands roamed over the smaller form, still minding the boundaries through great effort, although he was now grinding against John’s ass.

The blue-eyed boy, as a whole, didn’t seem to mind too much, he was laughing at Dirk’s reaction, and ignoring it for the most part while he focused on winning this round of the racing game; which given that Dirk had abandoned his stake in it, wasn’t difficult. When he crossed the finished like and the digital confetti came down he cheerfully exclaimed “I won!” Turning to look at Dirk and seeing nothing but black shades.

Dirk lazily looked at the screen before pulling John on top of him, making the other male drop his controller as well. “Good job.” He mumbled, lips back on John’s neck. With the two chest to chest now, Dirk let his hands wander to that plush ass of John’s, the shorts had ridden up, his ass cheeks hanging out a little. The blonde squeezed and resisted the urge to slip a finger under those shorts and into John’s depths.

The brunette decided to go along with the activity, sucking on Dirk’s throat earning him a moan. He always enjoyed it when Dirk got all hands-y like this, feeling warmed and relaxed from it. He could tell that this session would require some more hands on attention from him, and whispered in Dirk’s ear “Do you want me to help you?”

A whiny “please” escaped the older male and John chuckled, letting his hand wander down, palming Dirk through his pants. He wasn’t quite prepare for the reaction he received. A long loud moan and arched back, all from a little touch, usually Dirk was more subdued in until he neared climax.

“Wow, you’re really sensitive right now aren’t you? Take off your glasses.” John actually liked jerking Dirk off. He loved seeing his boyfriend in such a vulnerable state, making the most adorable faces and sounds.

“Yes, sir.” Shades eagerly removed, he tried not to look like a dog, happily awaiting his master’s praise, completely unaware of the word that slipped through his lips.

John was a little befuddled at the word “sir”, but decided to ignore it. He unbuttoned Dirk’s pants, the blonde’s boxers displaying a large tent with a damp spot showing. He removed the boxers, Dirk hissing as the cool air hit his freshly revealed skin. John wasn’t touching him though, instead he was kissing Dirk, tongue slipping into his boyfriend’s mouth, a desperate whine could be heard. He pulled back, noses gently touching as shy blue eyes met orange and a hushed whisper asked “what should I do?”

“Touch me you dork.” It would have been a harsh command if Dirk wasn’t so red faced and pleading.

John allowed his fingers to gently trail up Dirk shaft, the strong one writhing at his touch, “I mean, what else?” The brunette was smart enough to know that Dirk had kinks, what kinks he wasn’t sure, but a vanilla hand job couldn’t be all that he wanted.

Dirk thought about it for a moment, what he really wanted was John to dominate the fuck out of him. He wanted to be ordered around, spanked, forced to suck something, but he didn’t want to freak John out, he was so scared of his needs being too much for the boy. “…Fuck my mouth with your tongue.” At least that as a level of dominance play to it, and it shouldn’t be too weird for his asexual boyfriend.

“What?”

“Like this.” Dirk cupped the back of John’s head, kissing him, coaxing this mouth open and demonstrating by thrusting his tongue repeatedly into John’s mouth.

“Okay, I got it, I got it.” John positioned himself comfortable, pulling out hand lotion from his pocket, usually he kept it on him for his dry skin, but it should work fine for this, and he began stroking Dirk. The blonde squirmed and moaned his name. John took his opportunity to plunge his tongue into Dirk’s mouth, doing his best to get his hand and tongue in sync. Dirk seemed to love it as muffled groans filled the room and big strong hands beckoned him closer. The boy felt a little ridiculous thrusting his tongue into his boyfriend’s mouth and tried not to laugh at how awkward he felt. At least he seemed to be doing a good job.

Dirk loved the feeling of repeated penetration, the combined sensation of it with the boy’s hand on his dick was damn near overwhelming after no sexual relief for so long. He felt almost half smothered and his mind started to blur with pleasure, thank god John was occupying his mouth because he wants to beg his master for more right now. John wasn’t his master, he needs to remember that. John never consented to being his master. Don’t put him in- Fuck that boy knows how to drive him wild.

 John changed up his technique, alternating the actions of his hand and tongue, Dirk grasped his shirt as he sped up his ministrations, he could feel Dirk’s muscles tense before coming in his hands. He milked Dirk through his orgasm before kissing his paramour’s forehead and getting up to grab tissues and wash his hands. When he reappeared Dirk was apparently basking in his afterglow, he didn’t notice John until the boy was right next to him and sex wasn’t truly complete without post coital snuggling. John was happy to oblige.

That was so fucking nice after such a dry lonely month. John was here, curled up nicely into Dirk’s chest, small arms around his large form. “Thanks John.” Kissing the brunette on top of his head as he nearly crushed the boy with affection.

John giggled, “Well, I mean I kind of owed you.”

“You mean for being a cheating little shit with the video game.”

“That, and…you know…”

Dirk shifted, looking John in the eye, a look of concern crossing his face, “No I don’t know. What makes you think you owe me sexual favors?”

“Well, I mean, I’m the odd one. I’m the weird one. I owe it to you to give you something kind of like normal relationship. I love you….I don’t want you to…I don’t know, get tired of me and what I can’t give you.”

“Oh, honey.” John tensed, what did he do wrong? Dirk cradled his face and kissed him sweetly, moved to his one cheek then the other, finally resting their foreheads against each other. “John, I don’t want you to worry about what’s normal. Normal doesn’t mean shit. I’m certainly not normal. I love you so fucking much, if you never wanted to touch me in a sexual way again, I’d figure something out. Do you feel pressured to do things with me?”

“Not what we’ve been doing, no. And I swear you’ve never made me feel like I needed to do anything more. I just….It’s so unfair to you, that I’m not, you know.” John’s voice barely audible as tears pricked his eyes.

Dirk sighed, cradling John’s head, he forgot how hard it is being twenty, feeling like you have to live up to some stupid fucking ideal and you’re scared shitless about what life is and if you’re doing it right. For some people that stays with them their entire lives, Dirk still struggled with it himself from time to time. “Sweetie, you don’t have issues. Well, we all have issues, but anything regarding us and sex isn’t one of them. I mean, you are already doing a lot and not getting anything out of it.”

“I get stuff out of it!”

“Like what?”

“Well, for one you’re always super cuddly afterwards, which I like. And I enjoy getting you off, in my own way. I just, like seeing you in a way no one else gets to. I don’t want to lose that.”

“You’re not going to, John. I promise I’m happy. But I want you to do something for me.”

“What?” John couldn’t help but be a little nervous, what if he couldn’t live up to Dirk’s expectations?

“I want you to think of ways I can give back. I always take and it isn’t sitting right with me. Especially with how it’s affecting you, I don’t think you would feel this way if I was a better fucking boyfriend. I’ve been an ass, you need to know this whole thing is give and take. What can I do to make you feel good?”

“…kiss me.” Dirk was about to argue, say that kissing couldn’t be enough, they kissed all the time, and then he saw the look in John’s eyes. Emotionally vulnerable (who wouldn’t be after this conversation?) and needy, needing connection.

“I’ve got you.” He muttered as he kissed the object of his affections. Cradling the other’s neck, bringing him close, it was different then their make-out session, it was different then their lazy hanging out kissing, it was utterly raw in a way Dirk hadn’t experienced before. John clung to him, a runaway tear down his face. Dirk tenderly wiped it away, gazing into his eyes and seeing a hazy unfocused look, this kid would be the death of him.  The physical world fell away and they were floating in a sky of tentative balance. He kissed the boy harder, breaking only to breathe and ask “What more can I do? How do I make this better of you?”

John wordlessly took his hands placing on in his hair and one on the small of his back, positioning them so Dirk was half laying on top of him… he should probably put his pants back on. John was kissing him again though and Dirk started massaging his head and back. Hand threading through dark hair, a pressing against little points of gathered tension. The other tracing the boy’s spine and drawing circles at its base. He could feel John melt underneath him, not into the couch, into him. John was utterly connected and seemed blissfully at ease as they kissed; like his anxieties were pushed out and he finally allowed himself to take.


	4. Kissing

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm on a fluffy fic kick right now. I hope you don't mind.

John awoke to a cold bed and wrinkled sheets, the faint sound of water running in the next room, Dirk’s morning shower.  He stared at the ceiling contemplating the heart to heart they had yesterday, a stubborn piece of unruly hair blocking his vision. Insecurity didn’t suit him; it’s just so hard when there’s this feeling of alienation from the rest of the world. An anomaly drifting in a world where every place you turn is sex, sex in movies, sex in books, sex in video games, ads, music, artwork, posters. If he didn’t think about it, then he was fine, no big deal. Hell, sometimes sexualized images or music can be really pretty or interesting to look at. He was perfectly fine with it as long as it was never applied to himself. And now he IS applying it to himself, and he doesn’t know how to stop, and it’s frustrating; as frustrating as the wayward lock disrupting his thoughts. He brushed it out the way, only for it to fall back to its chosen place, fucking hair.

“Where’s that headband?” John said to himself as he leaned half off the bed, rooting around in a week’s worth of discarded clothes. After several minutes of intense slanted searching, John raised his arm in triumph, only for it to collide with his boyfriend’s face.

“Ow, fuck!”

“Oops, sorry!”

“You did that on purpose as revenge for trying to sneak up on you.”

“No, I swear, I was just happy to find my headband.” Slipping the soft stretchable cloth over his head, John situated the piece, pointing to it for emphasis of his previous goal.

Dirk burst out into a fit of the most uncharacteristic laughter the heir had ever heard from him. He was about to question his boyfriend on the sudden case of giggles, when the blonde pulled him into the biggest, crushing hug of his life. The prince pulled him back into a reclined position on the bed, kissing the top of his head.

“You’re such a dork.” More kisses, John would be lying if he said he wasn’t enjoying it.

“Maybe I should act like a dork more often.” Nuzzling into Dirk’s neck, the smell of blue raspberry shampoo (John never outgrew those fun kid shampoos) and some non-distinct body wash, mixed with a personal musk filling his nostrils.”

“Mmmmmnnn, Yes you should.” Dirk was soon showering John with sweet kisses of nearly every order. Cheek kisses, mouth kisses, eskimo kisses, butterfly kisses, forehead kisses, John was soon giggling himself, and telling him to stop so he could give Dirk a few of his own smooches.

“What brought this on?” John asked smiling.

“Just feeling affectionate, plus that stupid fucking headband.”

“Looks that bad?”

“Not bad, but I doubt you’d want to be seen outside the house with it on.”

“My hair’s gotten too long. I need it out of my way.” Strong fingers threaded silky umber hair as a long intimate silence passed between them. Eyes flickering from hair to face to jawline before briefly meeting a calm, loving gaze and moving back to the hair.

“I think you look good.” A soft whisper. “But you look good no matter what.”

John blushed a little and looked away as Dirk smirked at his reaction. Soft lips meeting the red cheek and a smooth whisper dripping with sincerity and a hint of adoration. “You do you know, you always look spec-fuck-tacular.”

The smaller male made a whimpering noise of embarrassment before burying his face in his broad boyfriend’s naked chest. Feeling the well-formed muscles tense, relax, and tense again as he felt arms around him.

“You going to a barber?”

John, turning his head so he could speak. “I should, but then I have to actually get dressed at leave the house. “

Dirk chuckled, “I could cut it for you.”

“Yeah, no thanks.” John scoffed.  
“Hey! I am a spectacular stylist. I do my own hair.”

Silence, complete and utter silence.

“Fuck off.”

John cackled.

“My hair is awesome.” Dirk said defensively.

“Yes, of course it is, sweetheart.”

“It is. “

“Yes.”

“You wish you had hair this cool.”

“I do.”

“Great, then its settled. I’ll cut your hair.” John was a little stunned, he had walked right into that one.

“Yeah, okay.”

“Good, let’s go into the bathroom and I’ll wash your hair.”

The blonde led John into the washroom, grabbing a chair on the way, to sit on while his paramour gave him the “Famous Strider Shampooing.” The warm water pleasant drenched his scalp, while the lather provided Dirk with plenty of soap to give John a good cleansing. Dexterous, powerful fingers not only worked the shampoo through his hair, but massaged every last bit of tension from his head and even a little down his neck. Nothing more than putty in a chair, the little tendrils of sleep calling him back into a warm cozy abyss of relaxation.

At some point the water cut and a towel appeared on his head. “John, I need you to lift your head for me.”

“Mmmmmm. Hmm? What?”

Dirk chuckled, “Feel good did it?”

“Yeah, really good. I think I feel asleep again for a moment.” John lifted his head groggily, too addle-brained to notice a small glow of pride illuminating from his dearest.  As Dirk dried, the soft tossing of his hair and the towel added to the soothing feeling left from the shampooing. His head was directed to tilt back, as he complied without even a thought, a kiss left on his forehead as a dreamy smile coated his heavy lips.   
“You’re cute when you’re relaxed.”

“So are you.” Slurred speech that made Dirk smile.

“I need you to keep your head up so I can do this, okay?”

“Yesh, shir.”  Another little loving snicker as the blonde combed through John’s too long hair.

The duration of the haircut was mostly silence. The deep swirling of John’s mind enough to distract him as Dirk worked on making sure John’s hair was perfection. The quiet snipping of the scissors was all that filled the space and as lucidity trickled back to John he realized, he was weirdly happy. Not the exhilaration of that moment when something amazing happens. Not that happy, when you run into a good friend while running errands, or when everything goes right for a full week. Not even that happiness of kissing your love after a long, productive day. It’s a warm happiness of contentment, that if this moment could last a life time and he never felt those other forms of happiness again, he would be okay. It was a happiness that glowed from the inside out and just let him bask in its edges, the edges were all he needed, the edges were all he wanted. The edges were like home and protection, enough to relax, but not overwhelm. Have a seat, fall asleep, no need to be on guard here.

“Alright, you’re done, look in the mirror.”

Dirk finished brushing the stray hairs from John’s shoulders as the younger male stood up. He turned around to face himself and his jaw dropped. He looked absolutely spectacular. The hair framed his face in a flattering masculine manner and was short enough to keep the hair out of his eyes, but long enough to still be played with.

“So…?” Dirk, half cocky, half insecure. He was sure he had done a good job, but there was a lingering doubt that John liked it.

The brunette turned around beaming at his boyfriend as the blonde’s self-protective smirk melted into a genuine smile. “I love it!” The smaller raised up on his tiptoes to give the taller a peck. Dirk soon returned it and quickly they were in a subtle battle of who could kiss who last. John won, kissing Dirk before nuzzling his neck and pulling back. “I owe you a fantastic breakfast, what do you want.”

“Do you have the stuff to make those whole wheat pancakes you made back in Texas, that one time.”

“Yep, coming right up.”

“I’ll clean this up.”

After the hair was swept up, the counter wiped down and the chair returned to its natural habitat, Dirk followed his nose to the delectable smells of the kitchen. The light coming in from the window, a stark white ray of sun created the most wonderful lighting to view John. Two beams, one behind him, one in front of him, a being of pure light. An angel unaware of his beautiful presence and charming profile. Soft bright skin, his long fingers running through his hair, smiling. Completely oblivious to Dirk’s presence, the most natural anyone could ever be.

Heaven, Dirk was in heaven.

**Author's Note:**

> And suggestions for couple activities and non-sexual reciprocation (I have several ideas, but I want to have a wider variety to chose from if you guys have ideas) are welcome! Constructive criticism is welcome too!


End file.
